I feel an overwhelming sense of impending doom. I’ve spent the past 365 days or so out of my hometown, and now out of my home country, escaping from heartbreak and lack of direction through various forms of distraction – both positive ones and negative ones. This includes studying, partying, developing relationships, breaking relationships, and following friends around the country/world to take a temporary break from my life and join theirs. One year later, now it is time to come home.
It is so nice to be so far away, but I guess, as expected, at some point reality has to seep its way back into your day. People have to start living the lives they lived before you arrived and will continue to live after you leave. Suddenly you may have overstayed your stay. I love meeting new people, but it is so hard to say goodbye and know that life must go on without you in it.
In the same sense, once I get home, I suppose I’ll have to entirely bounce back from my escape. I will have to take action on things that I have left untouched out of my fear for change. I had a life before coming here that is going to be expecting me to be back, 100% ready to take it by the horns and make something out of it.
India was a growing experience (and I do hope and pray I have the opportunity to come back and relive it as soon as possible). I have come to understand a few things: what type of person I want to be (on some level), what type of person, try as I may, I am not meant to be, and what a rush it is to become so close to people within a limited amount of time.
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