Full

I feel really full… of happiness. Like my heart is going to burst. I don’t remember the last time I felt this way. I think it’s the combination of being on my own so far away from home, doing what interests me, having a busy social life, and seeing my loving family. Every time I think about it, it puts a smile on my face. It’s been a very long time since I’ve woken up and wanted to start the day. I’m glad the motherland can help me find my inner happiness.

I know it is temporary and I know a lot of it has to do with my real life being on hold, but it means something to me to finally feel content with myself as I have been trying to fix so many things over the past year.

I think I have been waiting to be far away for a very long time.

I feel like I fit in here. I feel like people are genuine with me here when they do not have to be. I feel like people extend a hand to me here because they want to, not because they have to. I feel like I communicate better here and that I am understood here. I feel real love and attachment with the family members I have here. I feel like they have accepted me as I am and appreciate me for it. I feel like I operate on my own time and pace. I don’t feel like anyone is trying to bring me down, compete with me, judge me, or misguide me. It may have something to do with not being close to anyone, but having many people surrounding me.

I don’t know if I am trying to make this a perfect place, but it feels like a perfect place.